What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and...

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Why was Super Buu so afraid of having Fat Buu torn out and becoming Kid Buu if he was going to destroy the Earth even before his transformation?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

While emptying a house, have you ever seen something in it that blew your mind?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

What do teens do at night?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Why are people so terrified or bothered that a person has original creative ideas, hobbies or unique interests?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

What are some photos of female sexual organs?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Can they start feeding only one meal to prisoners on death row or those doing a life sentence? Because only then will it be real punishment. If they want extra food they can work or pay from their own pocket.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Why do some people never get to on a date even though they wanted to? Are they just too ugly and weird for everybody?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

You hold the door open for a lady and she stops in her tracks and screams at you, ‘Don’t hold the door for me! I’ll get it myself!’ What are your feelings or immediate reaction?

Make Nazis afraid again!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.